Wildacres Day 9

Wildacres Day 9

Monday, July 8, 2013, was the first Sunny day at Wildacres. It seemed like everyone’s spirits lifted as the sky cleared. I even put the top down in my car and continued to let the sun dry the wet carpets in the car.

In the morning I wrote out a critique of the other student being evaluated today, Eli. As I told her in person later, I thought the quality of her writing was head-and-shoulders above the rest of the class, including myself. She is an excellent writer.

After lunch, I went for a run–my first run of this trip. The gravel road from Wildacres up to the Blue Ridge Parkway was very steep, and I had to stop and walk at the steepest parts. Although it was only a mile, it was a very hard mile. Once I got to the Parkway I ran along it until I reached the Wildacres Tunnel.  Then I returned for a total of about three miles.

In class in the afternoon, Jessica said, “Good nonfiction writing imposes order on a jumbled world.” She also said that metaphor is the connective tissue to holds stories together.

In the student critiques, I could tell my nine classmates agreed that Eli’s piece was wonderful.

When it came time for them to critique my samples, they were very helpful. I gave them the preface and two chapters of I Just Want to Be Happy.

Jessica—the teacher—set the tone by referring to other “quest narratives,” such as The Wizard of Oz. Interesting.

In one chapter I say I “watched in horror” as the World Trade Center fell. They suggested I describe exactly what I felt and saw at the moment. They also suggested a better balance between scene and setting. I now know I need to—as I tell my students—“show, don’t tell.” My book is too discursive; the strongest parts are actual scenes and dialog.

Several also suggested they wanted to know more about the suffering the narrator endured as a child of alcoholic parents. They all wanted to know more about the narrator—more of me! They also suggested more tension would help.

So perhaps I am not done. I now think I may need to do some more revision.

After dinner and more faculty readings, Will and I sat on the porch of the Guest House and watched a distant lightning storm. Clouds rolled in and enveloped us, and then they drifted away again, restoring our view of the mountains. We talked some and sat in silence for a while. We saw a few lights down in the valley below; we saw the lights of lightning bugs in the forest around us, and we saw the bright stars overhead. The stars are so much clearer in the mountains.

Our lazy conversation lasted until midnight. It was a beautiful evening.

 

 Mountain High

High in the mountains
the clouds part
revealing the infinite blackness
of the night sky
pierced by bright points
of white stars
planets
galaxies

Down in the valley
the fog lifts
revealing villages
in the valley
punctuated by lights
house lights
headlights
street lights

Nearby in the trees
the mist clears
revealing fireflies
blinking their signals
like semaphores
metaphors
stars.